Non-binary people do not exist in the eyes of the law, nor in the imagination of most of society. Creating networks and getting together is the only way to get to know each other, something that the State Non-Binary Meeting in December will try to facilitate.
Alana Queer, Non-binary trans activist, member of Sexualiarte.
@alanaqueer
Celia Fernández de Velasco, Member of Une Para Todes
@celifdevelasco
The Law for Real and Effective Equality for Transgender People and for Guaranteeing the Rights of LGTBI People, better known as the Trans Law, came into force in March 2023, more than two and a half years ago. While most of the trans organisations united in the Trans Platform celebrated the progress made by the law — and we are not going to argue that the law includes advances such as depathologisation and self-determination — we were left out with our wounds, as the celebrated trans law does not include non-binary people: self-determination remains limited to “man” and “woman”. The trans and LGBTI organisations that previously insisted that no one would be left behind now simply turned their backs on us; we no longer mattered.
To be honest, we are not the only group that was left out of the law. Trans migrants and trans children under the age of 12 were also left out, the latter representing a step backwards from Constitutional Court ruling 99/2019, which allowed trans people under the age of 12 ‘with sufficient maturity and who are in a stable situation of transsexuality’ to change their registered sex. Now, with Law 4/2023, they can only change their name, but not their sex.
With regard to trans migrants, the law only allows those trans migrants to change their sex in Spain who can prove that they cannot do so in their country of origin. Furthermore, two and a half years after the law was passed, there is still no regulation determining the ‘competent authority’ for this procedure, leaving trans migrants in legal limbo.
Regarding persons with disabilities, the Trans Law only states that ‘they may request, with the support measures they may require, the rectification of the reference to sex in the registry.’ The infantilisation of persons with disabilities continues.
Since the approval of the Trans Law, we, non-binary people, feel abandoned by the mainstream trans movement. Not only do we not exist for society in general, it seems that we do not exist for the Trans Platform either. We have learned our lesson: we need to organise ourselves to become visible and have our own voice.
Non-binary lives: discrimination and multiple forms of violence
In the summer of this year, the United Nations Human Rights Committee, the committee of experts responsible for monitoring compliance with the International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights, stated in its Concluding Observations on the report of the Spanish State: ‘with concern that Law 4/2023 limits the legal recognition of gender identity to the categories of “man” and “woman”, which in practice means that non-binary identities are not reflected in official identity documents or other administrative records of the State.’ It expressed ‘its concern that this lack of recognition exposes non-binary persons to discrimination in various areas, including public and leisure spaces, the education system, health services and employment, among others (arts. 2, 7, 17, 24 and 26).’ These articles refer to the prohibition of inhuman or degrading treatment, the right to privacy and intimacy, the right of children to non-discrimination, and non-discrimination in general. In other words, the Human Rights Committee states that the violence and discrimination we suffer in many areas of our lives constitute a violation of our human rights, specifically the International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights.
The first thing is our invisibility. We do not exist before the law, but neither do we exist in the imagination of most of society. This goes beyond transphobia or non-binaryphobia; it is more of an almost permanent experience of invalidation of our existence, the refusal to accept our identity as real or true. This is visibly expressed in any interaction with a stranger: that person will assign us a binary gender and treat us as either male or female, whether on a bar terrace, in a shop, on the street or at work. We have the option of permanently ignoring being misgendered, or coming out as non-binary x times a day. We experience countless forms of invalidation in multiple social contexts, which contributes to negative affective and cognitive processes, such as confusion, self-doubt, rumination, and internalised shame.
We do not have the space here to detail all the violence we suffer. Sexualiarte's May 2025 report to the Human Rights Committee summarises three studies on the subject. A recurring theme is that many of us practise cis-passing, hiding our identity in many areas of our lives to protect ourselves from violence. We also avoid certain spaces, which means limiting our freedom of movement or not participating in activities.
For example, many non-binary people avoid going to gyms or swimming pools because of the changing room issue. As trans people — binary or non-binary — we often feel that we do not belong in this space, in this changing room that we use. We have to navigate this ‘not belonging,’ with all the emotions and fears that this causes us. And we have to choose, if the gym staff lets us choose, where we feel least at risk. According to the Transaludes 2024 survey, 45.8% of trans and non-binary people have stopped using sports facilities due to discrimination or fear of discrimination.
Being non-binary often means that your world shrinks. According to a survey by the European Union Agency for Fundamental Rights, 81% of non-binary people avoid certain spaces for fear of being discriminated against, harassed or subjected to violence: 12% always, 24% often and 45% sometimes. We must add to this that 81% of non-binary people practise cis-passing in public spaces, half of them frequently. Living in hiding. And despite high levels of cis-passing, six out of ten non-binary people have experienced discrimination in leisure and recreational activities and spaces.
These patterns of violence and discrimination, of practising cis-passing and hiding to protect ourselves – unsuccessfully – are repeated in all areas of our lives: education, healthcare, work, and even interpersonal relationships. For more information, we encourage you to read the Sexualiarte report from May 2025.
As a consequence, the percentage of non-binary people who consider their health to be poor or very poor is very high. In the general population, 85.3% consider their health to be very good or good, compared to only 44.2% of non-binary people. More than 70% of health problems are related to mental health: anxiety, depression, eating disorders and other mental health issues. For example, in the general population, only 6.0% have attended a psychology, psychotherapy or psychiatry consultation in the last 12 months, while in the trans and non-binary population this figure rises to 66.0%. Discrimination, invisibility, avoidance of public spaces, lack of networks and social violence have very negative consequences for non-binary people, who will also have greater difficulty accessing social and health care services.
Non-binary activism: coming together to organise ourselves
The only way to save ourselves a little and be able to exist in the broadest sense of the word, without hiding anything, and being seen by the person in front of us, is to get together with our peers and build networks. Our chosen family, our friends, the bonds and relationships we establish with other trans and/or non-binary people are often what give us the strength to try to live in the hostile world outside.
It feels like taking a breath because it is as necessary as breathing. It may seem exaggerated, but the constant struggle to feel valid is exhausting and leaves us with only enough strength to look for shelter, and sometimes even that is beyond our means. We could even say that ‘sticking together’ and seeking out others is a form of activism because we put our bodies on the line in that search and face it head-on, often with a backpack full of difficult and sad experiences. In turn, that encounter helps us to come together and be visible in demonstrations and collectives, but also in the streets and public spaces as dissident bodies, and that is very necessary. We need to be seen so that we can erase the demonised image that people have of us and also to fight against our systematic erasure.
Creating networks and getting together is the only way to get to know each other and, very importantly, to understand our situations and experiences, what we need and what our demands are. The disconnect that non-binary people have between ourselves sometimes leads us to not know what we want to make our lives better. In activism and political circles, there has been talk of possible proposals to give us legal existence and allow us to choose a third option on our identity documents, the so-called third box; but there has also been talk of allowing the option of not indicating a gender, because some people feel more comfortable that way. Another issue that arises is what we need from the healthcare system, because we encounter major barriers and problems in accessing it: uninformed people, people who put up a thousand obstacles and need to be taught the laws so that they will treat us or allow us to access different treatments, outdated procedures, and a long list of other issues. There are also demands in elite or professional sports, which is a complicated issue. For this and other reasons, it is important to get together, talk, listen, understand, evaluate and reach conclusions because if everyone rows in a different direction, it will be useless and we will never reach our destination. Creating networks will save us individually and collectively.
Finding that connection is not always easy, as the context in which we live can make it difficult both to go out and look for those spaces and friends and to actually find them. Those of us who live in or near cities have the privilege that if you look, you will surely find one or more groups to join, or you can even go to places where you can meet other non-binary people. In some cities, you can even choose from several possibilities: collectives dedicated to care, collectives focused on activism, political groups, associations... and even groups of trans or non-binary people who play sports, do theatre, have created a book club or play role-playing games. It is not so easy, of course, when we talk about smaller cities, because there are not so many options, perhaps only two or three, or even fewer. and here we come to the point that many will no longer be exclusively for non-binary people but will include binary trans people, and therefore we may fall into the trap of demystifying the internal struggles of each letter; or there will be one group for the entire collective, which reduces the possibilities of establishing dialogue with peers. And well, let's not even talk about when you live in a village, with no possibility of being in a city, because in rural areas there are also non-binary people and they only have the virtual world or the luck that in their village or the next one there is someone from the community with whom they can share at least something.
State Non-Binary Meeting
As a result of that meeting, overcoming all barriers and having discussed and specified our demands, we will be able to organise ourselves and have our own voice, without letting others speak for us. It is not our intention to separate ourselves from binary trans people, lesbians, bisexual people, gay people or intersex people. The goal is not to create a separate movement, but to work internally to get to know each other and become stronger so that we can improve our lives and obtain the rights we deserve to exist in peace. We often hear discourses from people in the community who are not non-binary and they mention us or talk about us, and that is not wrong when there are no non-binary people in the room. It is important that we are taken into account and that they refer to us, but sometimes this is not done well or is done very badly. At a time when trans and/or non-binary people are constantly in the spotlight, when our rights and whether we should exist are debated every week—and sometimes every day—we have to be careful. In recent months, we have had to read how, while countries were suffering from various problems unrelated to us, we were being blamed for the economic and social situation in the country, because yes, it is easier for today's politicians to say ‘this is the fault of trans people’ than to take responsibility for the consequences of their actions or inactions. But the worst thing is that the people who vote for them, in effect, join in that hatred and say, ‘Of course, it's the trans people's fault.’ That's why we have to be careful when we talk about ourselves in our discourses and not fall into the trap of being used as a political weapon. And above all, don't step on anyone's toes: if there's a non-binary person in the room, in your collective, at the demonstration or wherever you are, pass them the microphone. We need to be heard directly, not through others.
All these reflections have led a small group of non-binary people from all over Spain to organise a State Non-Binary Meeting. It will take place in December during the Constitution Day long weekend, from the 5th to the 8th. It will be held at a hostel in Cercedilla, north of Madrid. Under the slogan ‘Creating Networks,’ we will spend a few days together getting to know each other, debating, caring for each other, and talking about our experiences and vital needs. We are sure that these will be fruitful and enriching days. Registration is now open, and we are very happy to have already received the first registrations. We believe that this meeting can be very important for our community. It is a great opportunity to build community, join forces and, of course, spend a few days together and enjoy ourselves.
We encourage all non-binary people reading this to come, and everyone else to support it in whatever way you can, from spreading the word to contributing financially through our crowdfunding campaign. Any donation is very welcome, as we want to reduce all possible costs for the meeting.
Published (in Spanish) in El Salto, 3 November 2025, https://www.elsaltodiario.com/opinion/habitar-hoy-persona-no-binaria-encuentro-estatal
- Log in to post comments